The Missions are on the Move.

Once again the Missions are Moving, we made the leap from Blogger.com back in December to the land of WordPress.

Well we now made a massive leap of faith and we are now SELF HOSTING! It fills me with fear as I have no clue about whats what and how to do stuff.  I am a technophobe when it comes to stuff like this.  So with a little help from a willing helper who actually knows what he is talking about.

The Lovely Gareth, has taken some time out of his relaxation time and moved the Missions over to self hosting on WordPress.org.

So make sure you subscribe to our new blog, as this little baby will be closing in a few weeks time.

We are now www.amumonamission.co.uk it has a nice ring to it don’t you think?

Make sure you pop on over, we will be having drinks, nibbles and lots of laughs.  See you all over there.

Lots of love

Mummy

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I Have To Make This Work!

 

It has been one of those weeks in the Mission household.  Apart from the normal 5 loads of washing a day, the cooking, the cleaning, the school runs, the homework, the reading books and the bath times, I really didn’t think I could fit anything else into my life.  That was until I decided to embrace the chance to add another group of services to my current business.

You see I’m normally just playing mummy and running my very small Freelance Media Company.  We are very small and my role is to find real life stories and with the help of my lovely friend and work colleague Fiona, we get those stories published in magazines such as Bella, Take 5, Take a break etc.

I love my job, I love talking to the people (as strange as they may seem at first) and I love being able to help get their stories out there, for everyone to see.  Things can be slow and steady and the income can come in thick and fast or nothing for months.  So I decided that a regular income is what this little family needs, but what?

I started searching the local ads for admin positions…Nothing.

I put my CV on Jobsite and Monster.  With all my 18 years experience there must be something…Nope Nothing.

I would lie awake for hours my mind would race.  You see the whole point in me finding an income was so I could support my family more.  We don’t need material things, the children never go short of shoes and clothes (when they need them) I was thinking on a bigger scale.  The Missions need a bigger HOUSE.

You see we live in a lovely little 3 bed semi detached house, which was fine when there were just the four of us.  It was a bit squashed with five of us, but now there are SIX of us and we have suddenly out grown the whole house.

With Teenager and Monster sharing a bedroom (13 and nearly 3) the situation is far from workable.  Teenage Mission would love his own space, for his friends to come and stay, but with Monster in his room there is just no way that can happen.

Drama and Princess also share a room (10 and nearly 5) this situation is a bit more workable as the gap isn’t so big.

Then there is me and daddy.  As much as I would love my own room away from the snoring and the farting, I would just be grateful for a bed that has space around it.  We are currently in the box bedroom which has no space at all.  When daddy wants to get out of bed he has to climb over me and normally stands on my leg or foot getting out.

So I decided to work on the principal that if I got a regular income coming into the house then Daddy really couldn’t refuse to let us move. 

I decided to work on my strengths and work with what I am good at. I spoke to some people and decided to add a Virtual Assistant service to my small company.

I have worked day and night for the last two weeks.  Looking out for free advertising, setting up a blog, a website, some social networking via BT Tradespace and badgering friends to take my business cards and leaflets into their places of work.

So far so good, *checks phone is working* *Checks inbox AGAIN*

I know things are going to be slow at first but this has to work.

I have been called a few things over the last few months; selfish seems to be the keyword that keeps getting thrown back at me by people I thought were friends.

 “You’re just being ungrateful, as you have roof over your head.”

“I should learn to just make the space work in the house and not be so demanding.”

“You’re just being a drama queen.”

“Stop being so selfish.”

To quote just a few of the sentences, which have been thrown at me over the last few months.

Believe me I have tried so hard to make everything work and if we could create another room in the house to make it a bedroom then I would.  The space in the house is unworkable; the house is just too small.

So if I have to work day and night I will make this business work.  If I have to work two jobs as well as the business then I will, for the good of my family.

So if you know any businesses, tradesmen/woman, anyone who needs some Admin and Clerical help with their business then please get them to drop me and email or give me a call.

Thanks for listening to me rant and moan (I promise I’m so not a drama queen)

Lots of Love

Mummy

www.freelance-media.co.uk

http://freelancemediagroup.wordpress.com/

http://freelancemediagroup.bttradespace.com/

Who Said Romance is dead? (Well maybe not quite!)

 

I have heard it being said on so many occasions and it’s so true (well in the Mission house it is anyway),  You see Daddy Mission has never been very good at romance, when we first met he wined and dined me (well chippy tea and a bottle of red counts doesn’t it?)

He never really got the hang of the whole romance thing, but he is a man and not many of them get it right.  We girls have had our hope raised by watching chick flicks where the man Woo’s the woman, sends her flowers, gives her Diamonds and does the whole romance thing.

Daddy Mission did try in the early stages.  I once told him I saw a cute little puppy (a stuffed one) in a shop on the way home from work.  The next night I arrived home from work and he told me that I couldn’t go into the kitchen.  When I asked why he said he had found a little puppy roaming around outside and as we lived on the main road he brought it in until the RSPCA arrived.

I went to investigate; my kitchen was no place for some flea invested puppy!  There sitting in the middle of the kitchen floor was this little stuffed puppy I had told him about the previous night.  Kicking myself that I didn’t tell him about the huge diamond I saw instead, he was rewarded with a kiss from mummy.

I also remember another time when he called me at work to tell me he had brought me a gift.  I was excited all day, when I arrived home he proudly opened the kitchen door to show me my gift.  A Washing Machine (what every woman dreams of), I rolled my eyes and went off to get changed.  Later on Daddy Mission gave me his socks and told me to go and do a wash (so romantic) ignoring his request I carried on watching TV.  Later that evening I decided now that I have a new washing machine I may as well use it. So whilst daddy was in the shower I took some washing into the kitchen as I opened the washing machine door I found a silver box inside (now realising why daddy was so keen on me doing a wash) I decided to play trick on him.  I took the silver box out and put the clothes in and turned on the machine.

Daddy rushed downstairs to find me sitting watching TV (well I was 3 months pregnant) he had this strange grin on his face.  When I asked what he was grinning for he said “Did you get your present?” (He wasn’t talking about the washing machine but play along)  “Yes you showed me the washing machine” I replied.

“No your other present?” daddy announced.  “What are you talking about?” I asked.  He went on to explain that he thought the washing machine was a bit of a crap present to give to a three month pregnant woman so he had hid a gift inside (which he really didn’t think I knew about).  When I told him I had just put the washer on his face was a picture (I’m so mean).  He rushed outside to find the silver wrapping from the present on the side and me standing in the doorway wearing my gorgeous present.

He had brought me a charm bracelet with a heart charm on it.  It was so beautiful, but he lost daddy points for trying to trick me.

I could go on forever with the “thoughtful” presents daddy has brought me and none of them were romantic.  The Ironing board, the Chocolate Subuteo (don’t ask), the garage flowers, the list is endless.  It can’t be just Daddy Mission that is the most unromantic man in the world.  Can it?

I know we had the whirliest whirl wind romance, we had only been going out with each other for three months then I discovered I was pregnant with Teenage Mission. 

He does try every now and again, like this year he never sends me an Anniversary card (he never remembers), never mind a Valentines Card (which I don’t really mind) but this year things are looking up.  I actually got a Valentines Card with the message “I may drive you mad sometimes, but my heart is in the right place…Next to yours. “

So fingers crossed after 14 years together and 8 years married he might actually remember what date our wedding anniversary is.  Fingers crossed. Xx

Lots of love

Mummy

 

Bad Mummy Club – Can the next Mummy step forward Please?

Today’s Bad Mummy Club will be brought to you by the lovely

@TheMummyLife .  As usual minutes will be taken for those Bad Mummy’s who can’t attend because they are eating biscuits and watching Jeremy Kyle.

Ok so id like to join!, let me introduce myself….. I’m Laura and im 26 and also a first time mum to a boisterous 12 month old (takes cover from a piece of flying banana – uhum cake) – i’d like to take refuge here. Thankyou.

I give him sweet things, cake, wotsits – all in moderation (of course) but you can’t eat around him without wanting to retrieve the yumminess from the inside of your mouth whilst your chewing! I also give him green stuff – so its not THAT bad, however the green stuff *may* have been from a microwave veggie steam bag. Its still green.

I still use jars… well those steam meals actually.. god forbid he eats the food I cook…. I’ll definitely be sticking to the jars *for his own good* for the foreseeable future.

Sometimes I ignore him in the mornings when I can hear him talking in his cot and I’m so exhausted I cant move my rump out of bed – if I’m lucky he will fall asleep again. If not he will come play on my bed until I’m able to get out!

Little Einsteins is a miracle worker. I LOVE BT vision.

I have been known to put tights on him – some think tights on a boy is cruel (never pink!) but he cant pull his socks off that way 😉

He gets bathed only 2-3 times a week – what do you think baby wipes are for?!?!?! (granted if he’s smeared in food or his own poo we will bend this rule)

I absolutely adore my boy and he is the happiest smiliest little guy I know , some would call me a bad mummy but how can I be THAT bad when he’s healthy and happy?

I would like my star though 😉

Life isn’t about rules, life is about living and living well, whatever your parenting technique or routine. You children’s happiness is the main factor.

Well done ladies in the Bad mummy Club – bringing up kids is hard work!!! we are all doing fantastically 🙂

10 Things they don’t tell you when you become a Mum – The Toddler Years 1-3

 

1.   Back to Work, now if you’re lucky you may be now returning to work after your mat leave.  This will be the most heartbreaking time of your life, leaving little one.  But after a few weeks you will realise that this is actually Mummy Time.  Yes you may have to do something whilst your there, but essentially it’s just a nice long tea break and a catch up with some mates.

2.  Walking and Talking:  Two things every parent wishes their child could do from an early age.  Stop wishing it on your child, because once they start there is NO stopping them.  They can get into mischief in an empty room if you let them.  You will never be safe in the knowledge, that you know exactly where your child is all the time, especially if you have cupboards.

3.  Valuables and Ornaments: Now is the time to move anything of any value out of your house for good.  Not only will your little one want to destroy every little trinket you have, you will also find everything covered in slobber, snot and food.

4.  Siblings: This is where sibling rivalry takes place.   When your older child (if you have one) decides that his/her little Brother or sister isn’t that much fun anymore.  They are leaning that they can take their toys and destroy their works of art; siblings are just no fun especially little wobbling ones.

5.  Tea Time will become a trial they will go through the most bizarre phases, I like beans… erm no I don’t like them anymore.  You will find that you will try two or three different meals a night just to try and get them to eat something.

6.  Food:  Will become your enemy, you will find it hidden in the most unusual places, the back of the sofa (normally Toast), chocolate (normally stuck to ANY glass surface), Crumpets (normally Mummy’s handbag) well I suppose they are just thinking about us getting peckish whilst we are doing the housework.

7.  Sharing: This is the hardest part, no one likes sharing but as good parents we teach our kids that is so important to share.  As a parent I DONT share, it’s my wine, my chocolate and my bubble bath. I’m sorry I have got four little sisters I shared enough over the years.

8.  Potty Training is a time of pride.  When little one decides he or she has had enough of the nappy and your bank manager calls you to thank you for not being in the red from now on.  Be warned you will find little puddles and Poo’s in little places around the house the first few weeks.  Remember they are NOT puppies please do not rub their little noses in the wee.  Point them in the direction of the potty and pray.

9.  Bath time:  A time when your bathroom will resemble a scene from Titanic.  YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!

10.  Bedtime: This is a time that us Mum’s and Dad’s look forward too at the end of a hard day.  The luxury about little ones is that they can’t tell the time. So if 6.30pm comes around and you really need a rest it’s off to bed no fuss about it not being time and the Joy of SKY + if your crafty enough is to record the bedtime song and the red screen at the end of Cbebbies, they will never know.

So that’s the Toddler Years out of the way, just think there are so many more years to look forward too.  Enjoy!

Lots of love

Mummy

Bad Mummy Club – Can the first Mummy step up please?

Right Guys welcome to the first official meeting of the Bad Mummy Club, today discussions will be started off by the lovely Caroline Hirons 

I will be taking minutes for those of you who can’t attend, so see me after the meeting.

Confessions of a Bad Mother Part One.

41, mum of four aged 19, 16, 9 and 6. BBGB.

I would like a Bad Mother badge because – In no particular order:

1. I love my kids – but I would like to be able to poo/bathe in piece for just ten minutes without interruption. So I sneak off when I need time to myself. Throw food in front of them (or even better, sweets) turn the telly on and away I go. Even if I get 5 minutes – bliss.
2. During the winter my two youngest get baths once a week at the weekend. I don’t have the energy or the inclination – they go to school in full uniform and come home – how dirty can they BE?? Obviously in the summer they get sweaty and dirty every day but that, dear friends, is why the Sweet Baby Jesus made garden hoses and paddling pools. Chuck ‘em in, splash around, get them out and put them straight into their pj’s.
3. I hate the park. Sorry, I mean I. HATE. THE. PARK. – a nice long walk through a BIG park, like Hyde Park/Kensington Gardens – fine.
   I’m talking about a PLAYGROUND scenario. Swings/Slides/merry-go-rounds??? Ugh. No thank you.  ‘Push me! Look at me! Watch me! Push me! Mummy it’s MY turn!’ No thanks – you can keep it – I’ll take them shopping and for lunch. I’m exhausted thinking about it.
4. Ditto public swimming pools. Wading around in a big vat of other people and their kid’s piss? I’d rather shoot myself in the face. Ask Daddy. He’ll take you – I’m cleaning.
5. I hate helping with homework. Mine get FAR too much and it is just NEVER ENDING. I hate it. And school ‘projects’? You can shove them up your arse too. ‘Mummy I forgot to tell you – I’m a tree in the play tomorrow!’ Jesus. ‘Mummy I need to make the complete planetary system for science tomorrow.’ That teacher is NOT on my Christmas card list and is lucky if they don’t receive a verbal bashing in the middle of the playground.
6. If my 16 year old leaves his phone unlocked and near me I read his text messages. Don’t give me that crap about privacy – he’s 16! Remember 16??? You’re an IDIOT at 16. You think you know everything – you know NOTHING. I’m merely protecting his interests. He’s extremely intelligent but the lack of common sense in him and his friends is astounding. But they can’t help it – they’re 16. And anyway, he KNOWS I’m going to read his messages so it’s really his fault if he leaves it lying around – isn’t it?
7. I lie to my kids. All the time. Not about the important stuff, just stuff that I’ve decided they need to be told a lie about. No guilt whatsoever.
8. I swear in front of them. Every day. They tell me off. I try. But come ON. I’m human. And it’s probably their fault that I’m swearing in the first place!
9. They eat whatever we have the energy to cook. They are on first name terms with every cereal on the market. And if mummy and daddy are exhausted? Pizza. Takeaway. Chinese. Takeaway. See a pattern?
10. I throw out their stuff. They have so much CRAP and they leave it lying around EVERYWHERE, they get one warning, after that if it’s not moved it goes in the bin. Sometimes i just bin it. What they don’t know is gone they won’t miss…

 

I would like to counter the above by stating for the record:

My babies are the love of my life.
They are my favourite people on earth.
I would die for them, happily.
I tell them every single day how much I love them and how gorgeous/clever/special they are.
I know they are coming down with something before they do – it’s the sweet smell of their breath and something in their eyes.
I know what childhood illnesses they have all had and when they had them, like a diary in my head.
I know them better than anyone – I know what they are thinking before they think it.
If i die tomorrow I will rest easily knowing that I did the best job I did and my kids will know how much they were worshipped and adored.

Just don’t ask me to go to the park.

I’m sure you will agree Caroline deserves a Gold Star for being a Bad Mummy…Welcome to the club!

10 Things they really don’t tell you about becoming a Mummy!

THE BABY YEARS – 0- 1

1.  The birth can go either way it can be long and traumatic or it can be quick and easy.  But what they don’t tell you is you will probably suffer from either a tear or piles.  Both not nice and both will make weeing uncomfortable for a few days.

2.   Remember your Boobs?  Well you had better forget them right now because as we speak they are heading south (and I don’t mean heading to London) and they will leak on you at the most inappropriate time.  Be warned!

3.   Sleep will become a thing of the past; you will learn to survive on half an hour a night and probably less during the teething stages.

4.   Advice: Having a baby and being seen with it in public gives total strangers the green light pop over and have a look, which is great but it also gives them the right to give you the most bizarre advice ever!

5.   A quick trip to the shops will become a thing of the past, trips in future will be planned in military style.  You will need 2 milk bottles (just in case), a water bottle, bibs, 2 changes of clothes, unlimited nappies, wipes, dummies, blankets, favourite bear and that’s only for a quick trip to the asda.  If you decided to go out for the day or god forbid your even thinking of planning a holiday them you will need to hire a bloody van!

6.   Your lovely quiet, clean and tranquil home WILL turn into a scene from how clean is your home.  No matter how many times you clean, tidy and Hoover you will always find a bottle or toy belonging to the new addition.

7.   The Health Visitor:  This is normally either a woman in her 50’s or a woman in her 20’s the older the health visitor normally the better (I said normally) the younger ones will speak to you like they are reading from a text book.  You ask them a question and they will google the answer!

8.   You will become very familiar with your kitchen sink as you will spend so much time cleaning bottles, but your kitchen will be the cleanest room in the house.

9.   You will have a new best friend, the washing machine.  You may have the smallest house guest you have ever had but they will create the greatest washing pile ever!

10.   Mummy/Daddy relationships, they will change dramatically!  If he moves in for a cuddle, you pretend you’re asleep in fear that he might want a bit of the other and you are simply just too tired.

Hope all of this has helped and if you have any of your own leave it in the comments box.

Lots of love

Mummy